Saturday, September 16, 2017

Rifleman

First appearance: Downrange (2017)
A group of teens run afoul of a masked maniac. Unlike normal teen exterminating masked manics, this one doesn't use cutlery or power tools or forestry equipment, he's got a rifle.
Weird variation on a slasher flick. I really liked the ending.



Friday, September 15, 2017

Joseph

First appearance: The Crescent (2017)

A woman and her child move into her mother's house to deal with the grief of losing her husband and to marble paper. Unfortunately for her there's some weird stuff going on around the beach.
A horror flick in the vein of EYES OF FIRE and MESSIAH OF EVIL.


Thursday, September 14, 2017

Ernest P. Worrell

First appearance: Dr. Otto and the Riddle of the Gloom Beam (1986) [Yeah, I know Ernest was doing commercials and stuff before this movie but this is his first movie appearance]

Beloved comercial personality Ernest P. Worrell makes a couple brief appearances in the Jim Varney movie Dr. Otto and the Riddle of the Gloom Beam, which is an odd 80s comedy where Varney plays a variety of characters (all disguises of Dr. Otto). Eventually Ernest gets a chance to star in his own movie Ernest Goes to Camp. If you’re going to watch an Ernest movie I’d suggest any of the Touchstone flicks and/or Ernest Rides Again.
Since everyone likes "Goes to Camp" here's the trailer for that:


Monday, September 11, 2017

Mrs. and Mr. Ryan

First appearance: Mom and Dad (2017)

For some reason parents have an uncontrollable urge to kill their offspring. Not ALL kids, just their own. Could it be some kind of attack on the country or the entire species! It doesn't matter, your parents will kill you.


Jötunn shape shifter


First appearance: The Ritual (2017)

Four friends go on a hiking trip to morn the death of one of their other friends. The learn that it's not a good idea to take shortcuts.
Based on a novel by Adam Nevill


Friday, August 25, 2017

Pennywise The Dancing Clown

First appearance: 2017

A bunch of kids run afoul of some kind of horrible shapeshifting monster that lives in the sewer beneath there home town. The monster takes the form of what it's victims fear most favouring the look of a creepy clown, and surfaces every 27 years to feed.
Movie based on the Stephen King novel but shifts the story 27 years into the future.


Pennywise The Dancing Clown

First appearance: 1990

A bunch of kids run afoul of a giant spider from outer space (possibly from another dimension) who wakes up every 27 years to feed. The space monster takes on the forms of things it's victims are scared of. This doesn't stop the kids from defeating the spider monster.
Unfortunately for the kids they didn't kill the space monster so IT comes back 27 years later to annoy the now adults to death.
90s TV Miniseries Based on a Stephen King novel and for some reason very popular even though the monster is more irritating than frightening.


Thursday, April 27, 2017

Rawhead Rex

First appearance: Rawhead Rex (1986)

Some kind of weird monster is pissing on priests and killing folks in Ireland. what could it be? it's Rawhead Rex! Based on a story by Clive Barker, who was not happy with how it turned out, nor was he happy with what the monster looked like. People seem to like it though, it's getting a 4K restoration and is being released on BluRay soon.




Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Jason Voorhees (finally the last one... until the next remake)

First appearance: Friday the 13th (2009)
Hey remember those other 10 movies that Jason was running around killing kids? Yeah, well, None of that happened because we've decided to reboot the series. This one almost plays like a sequel to the original 1980 movie. Not the worst of the movies to feature Jason Voorhees but also not quite the best. One of the few Friday the 13 movies where some of the action actually takes place at Camp Crystal Lake. Might finally be the last Friday the 13th movie.



Jason Voorhees (seriously how many of these are there?)


First appearance (looking like this): Freddy Vs Jason (2003)

Nobody believes in Freddy anymore so he resurrects Jason to kill some teens in Springwood so the teens will blame Freddy. Unfortunately Jason's having too much fun killing kids so Freddy fires him. The kids come up with the great plan of using Jason to fight Freddy. Mayhem ensues.
It took 10 years from the tease at the end of Jason Goes to Hell for this to finally happen.



Jason Voorhees (again)

First appearance (looking like this): Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday (1993)

Jason gets blown up and then it turns out he's actually some kind of worm thing that possesses people or something. Also Jason's mom visited a bunch of other horror movie locations when Jason was growing up? (There's a copy of the Noturum De Montos, a mandarin dagger, the box fluffy from creepshow was in...) Yet another adventure of Jason Voorhees that doesn't take place at Camp Crystal Lake.


Thursday, February 23, 2017

Captain Spaulding

First appearance: The House of 1000 Corpses (2003)

Four jerks go on a road trip to find the truth about the mythical serial killer "Dr. Satan." What they find is the horrifying Firefly clan. things don't go well when they offend the Fireflys by not accepting their hospitality. Moral of the story, don't be a jerk.



The Collector

First appearance: The Collector (2009)

Arkin just wants to turn his life around and quit being a a cat burglar. Unfortunately his wife owes some horrible people a lot of money. These horrible people force Arkin to pull one more heist on the people he's currently employed by. Unfortunately for Arkin there's someone else interested in the family...



Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Jacob Goodnight


First appearance: See No Evil (2006)

Jacob Goodnight enjoys pulling out eyes.  An unfortunate group of delinquents attempting to turn his stomping ground into a homeless shelter find this out the hard way.

This appearance: See No Evil 2 (2014)

Turns out you just can't keep a Goodnight down. Jacob gets up to his old shenanigans with a new look, this time at an undertaker's birthday party at the city morgue!



Beach Ball with Claws


First appearance: Dark Star (1974)

Follow the mission of the crew of the planetary demolition space ship Dark Star.
John Carpenter's first feature film written by Dan O'Bannon (who also stars).
If it wasn't for this movie we wouldn't have Alien, Red Dwarf, or that cool stretchy star field thing we see in Star Wars when they activate their Hyper Drives.



Monday, February 6, 2017

Hellcop

First appearance: Highway to Hell (1991)

Charlie and his girlfriend don't listen to the warnings of a creepy guy at a gas station and end up running afoul of the HELL COP. Hell Cop kidnaps Charlie's girl. Charlie goes to hell to find his girlfriend. Charlie has a nice adventure through hell encountering a bunch of colourful characters.
Will he be able to find his girlfriend? Can he escape hell?

Thursday, January 19, 2017

Creech

First appearance: Monster Trucks (2017)

Three strange creatures are forced to the surface by a oil company drilling for oil through a vast labyrinth of caves and tunnels somewhere in Colorado. One of these creatures befriends a local teen loser and helps power his truck in exchange for help freeing the other creatures. Madness and Destruction ensue.



Friday, January 13, 2017

Jason Voorhees (again)

First appearance: Friday the 13th part 7: New Blood (in this configuration) (1988)

Part Seven is when Kane Hodder takes over playing Jason. Interesting that he's the fan favourite Jason actor but he's in the movies that the Friday the 13th fans like the least, go figure.

Anyway Jason kills a bunch of people at a cabin on Crystal Lake and fights a psychic. Yet another Voorhees rampage that isn't at Camp Crystal Lake.

TRAILER!